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Monday, December 17, 2012

Of fornications and war declarations

She was pregnant.
But that did not stop the attacks. On the contrary in fact. It had taken all her strength to run and hide from the heartless monsters, but she realised that it was time to move on. With a tearful prayer, she climbed out of the window, and started a long and dangerous trek through uncharted terrains.
She walked through jungles, sewers and tunnels and finally reached a housing development. While most of them looked cheerful and festive, it was the dark unlighted one that she was instantly drawn to. She had gone through enough in one night to realise that darkness was her ally, her friend. She quickly slipped in, and found ample food to keep her happy.
Suddenly, she felt the pain.The capsule dropped, and in a few hours, her children were born - almost 30 of them. As they grew darker in color, she crooned:
"There is enough food for all of us. Do remember to fornicate frequently, for our strength is in numbers."

....which was when I switched on the light in the kitchen. The mother and her children roaches were surprised to see a screaming woman (that would be me) and her enchanted-and-eager-to-analyse son. They ran, while I decided to take  a crash course in armed combat. Now, equipped with a spray and boric acid, it is apparent that a brutal and bloody war is imminent - sans the screaming.


antbrain said...

HAHAHA!!!!! War has seldom been described with such fantastic melodrama! :)

Archana said...

I was literally rubbing my palms together with a maniacal grin as I prepared the boric acid mixture and kept it in strategic places.
No casualties yet.
Melodramatic doesn't cover the range of emotions I am feeling right now!

Anupama Srinivasan said...

Drama queen for sure! I liked the way you humanized the mom in your description.
Still terrified of these creatures?
Just think of the sweet adorable cockroach in Wall-E. (runs away)

Lakshmi said...

haha, it was hilarious!! in fact the title is so amusing that it piqued my curiosity.. u should write a novel archie :)

Viviene said...


Archana said...
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Archana said...

Thanks everyone!

Kunal Chandra said...
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Kunal Chandra said...

"She had gone through enough in one night to realise that darkness was her ally, her friend"

The only regret I have is that this jewel of a line was used in this post which turned out to be humourous in the end.

Very well written post and repeating myself - what a line!